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Wait, what? This is a thing? A thing people do here in Dallas?

This was my Gen X reaction to some of the “activities” I found among all of the escape rooms, scavenger hunts and paint-while-you-drink classes when I fell down a rabbit hole on LivingSocial recently. Maybe I’m just old, or maybe these things are really strange — you be the judge.

Attend a “silent party” at a club where everyone wears headphones and listens to their preferred music

This is an activity from Urban Fêtes, which “aims to introduce millennials to the newest trends in culture and nightlife.” To me, this is the equivalent of going to dinner with a people who look at their phones all night instead of talking to each other. If you’re going to go out with your friends, why would you want listen to different music and not be able to converse because you’re wearing headphones? And isn’t meeting people hard enough without that extra barrier? Then again, maybe it’s not so different from every other club …

Throw an axe and hit a target (and hopefully not a person)

This activity, which invites people to “get in touch with their inner viking as they learn to hurl a 1.5-lb. piece of spinning wood and metal,” has to be a direct result of the “Game of Thrones” craze. (I don’t watch GoT and have no idea what weapons are used to produce all the blood and gore I have no interest in seeing, but I imagine axes are in the mix.) I can’t imagine a situation in modern society that necessitates the skill of axe throwing, but apparently this sport is “addictive; so much so that the folks at Dallas have started their own leagues so enthusiasts can get their axe-throwing fix on the regular.”

Operate an excavator or a bulldozer

Granted, to do this you have to travel to a 300-acre site in Midlothian, but the fact that there is a place nearby where people can dig up dirt with actual construction trucks is ridiculous. “Our ten-acre pit gives you plenty of room to dig, roam, regrade, and practice. Impress friends and family with your skills while they listen in on headsets nearby.” All those sandpit dreams can finally come true.

Float in 10 inches of water in “a technologically advanced fiberglass capsule”

This is not a new phenomenon but it still weirds me out. Some people swear by this as a relaxation method, and the website purports that “it is the closest thing to attaining zero gravity on earth.” If it’s that relaxing, I’d be worried about falling asleep and drowning since you can drown in an inch or two of water. With this terrifying prospect, I can’t imagine being able to relax for five minutes, let alone 60. Sure, it hasn’t happened to anyone in a float capsule yet — the 700 pounds of epsom salt apparently make you crazy bouyant — but leave it to me to be the first.